Sunday, May 29, 2022
Saturday, May 28, 2022
After a strenuous workshop, a lot of us huddled in the cafeteria celebrating the end of the workshop. Cafeteria is always a hot place to hang around yet, we spend a lot of time there. Malavika, Rima and I decided to walk out of the cafeteria for a fresh breeze. Watching the tree silhouettes, we strolled out of the campus. Under a tree, we stopped and began to share what's happening in our lives. Rima recollected her old days and all of us joined the sharing. We spent 10 days together but, our conversations under the tree would be the most memorable conversations ever.
We walked out of the campus at dawn and we continued our conversations until the LED lights of the campus turned on and the road got buzzed by the streaming vehicles. We took a side on the road and discussed how art business works and our love life is going on.
Friday, May 27, 2022
Thursday, May 26, 2022
Sunday, May 22, 2022
Working on the script, I wish to consider some suggestions and feedback from people. I don't know whom to share with. I have friends but, I do not have friends who'd read for me and give feedback. Harry is the only soul who encourages me on writing and reading. Vinod is other, whenever I get to meet him. Mounika is another pen friend. To talk about reading, I have friends but, to talk about writing, I have a very few friends. Sometimes, I push myself to continue the journey in this craft as I gotta live with the truth that writing is a lonely journey.
Narasimha generally called as Mr. Sim is moving to Finland in a few months. It was great fun to work with him and travel along. Sim is the cool chap who doesn't get shaken up by anything in life. 'Why to worry? What's the point?' he shrugs off his shoulder and laughs away like a kid.
Energetic yet poised. Calm but very naughty. Erratic but disciplined. The energetic Narasimha can spend hours playing. He's always active to play and get into action but, he's poised in conversations and very polite.
He looks calm but he's very naughty. He finds fun in silliest things. A good sense of humor but, not everyone gets a chance to witness it. He picks on a few things and he's very addictive about it. Currently, he's quite a Chaiholic. Any day, he can come out and say he has quit Chai and he'd never touch it again. 'Everything is in mind.' I don't let anything get into my head, he says.
Interacting with Narasimha, I had great time understanding his perspective on life and the way he receives it.
"There's no control on future, you never had control in the past, why dwelling in both. Be there. Be present. Live," states Mr.Sim
Sim worked in Border Security Force and he got a lot of tales to share. I'm always intrigued with War & Spy craft. I do not understand the point of wars and also the people in it and the way people are dragged into it. Also the spy craft where there are no clear rules to play the game. It's always an unending dirty game. Sim worked for Border Security Force for a long time. On being asked on how his life in BSF has shaped him.
It worked in both good and bad ways, he explained.
Sim lost his father at the age of 11. At the age of 11, he had to support his family. His family included mother, his brother. Three of them struggled a lot. In the hope of finding some support system, they left their quarters and moved to Rajendra Nagar where their relatives lived. After sensing the way the relatives distanced from the family, they realised, they're good on their own. Sim, his brother were working from the age of 11. 'I used to wake up early, rent a cycle, get the milk and newspaper, drop them at home, attend school and then come home again. I didn't had time for anything. I didn't even had a cycle to do the work. Back then, a first hand cycle costed 1500rs. After saving some money, I bought a cycle in second hand worth 180rs to put paper and milk in the neighborhood."
He finished his 10th and never gave enough time to pursue his studies seriously, as he had a lot of responsibility to support his family. After 10th, when his friend was applying for BSF, he prodded Mr.Sim to apply. What to lose, he thought and applied.
We didn't had money to even go to the selections as it was near HAL, the other corner from which they live. Sim's mother went along with the Sim and his friend for the selection. Both Sim and his friend participated in all the running and other exercises. During the medical test, his friend couldn't get selected for his height. Sim was underweight and police official said, 'It's okay, he'll gain weight as he grow.' and got him selected. And put him in further rounds.
Sim's friend got rejected and returned home along with Mr.Sim's mother as they do not know how long the selection process would go. Even the officials instructed others to leave. The mother and his friend went away for their home. Sim was left alone in the selection process. "I was selected and asked me to get the documents. I was happy but, I didn't had money to go home." Narasimha narrated.
He got selected but, had no money to go to his home. As he was figuring out, he met another person who came for the selection and got selected. He came in his auto for the exam. "Come with me, i'll drop you," the auto person suggested. Tomorrow, I also have to come again to submit the documents. You can also join me." He mentioned. That's how Narasimha's journey into Border Security Force got started.
Narasimha worked in Barmer, Haryana, Kashmir & Bengal. He worked on all fronts. 'How is to be taught to be violent? How it affected your life?' I asked.
'Being taught to be aggressive, you become another person. All who are trained to be violent can't handle it. It's very hard to get back into civilian environment.' He explained.
Narasimha lost a couple of jobs because of his aggressiveness. Despite watching Sim fail in a lot of jobs, his favourite cousin- uncle's third son always found jobs for him. Finally after a lot of futile attempts, cousin's friend introduced Sim to rock climbing, the sport he really enjoyed. Getting into outdoors and playing brought a change in Sim's life.
As time passed by, he began to work with outdoor companies, got trained at National Mountaineering Academy and continued in Physical Education.
"How did you meet your love?" I asked.
"I met her during climbing. The friend who introduced me to her is in Germany." he recalled. My wife got selected to National Geographic Mt.Everest Climb. She's one of the five people who got selected, he started sharing about his love.
As she was into it, I motivated her to join fitness with me and we went along for a lot of runs together, that's how we began to know each other well.
Later, when both decided to marry, they faced the gir's family who were against the marriage. Together, they were sure of their relation and managed to convince everyone and got married.
Narasimha and his partner enjoy sports very much. Like father, like mother, their daughter also into sports. "We did a lot of marathons in Canada as well." Narasimha shared how they enjoy sports.
As the family is moving to Finland, I wish Sim and his family to have the best time and do what they love to do-Play
Saturday, May 21, 2022
New experiences pave us for more expressions.
I went for a long walk under the night lights in the campus. A silent slow stroll. I took 20 minutes to walk a small stretch watching for the darkness in the bright lit campus. There’s beauty in low light. There’s beauty in the night. I continued walking. Two young couple lied on the road watching the sky, a little far from them was the enthusiastic crowd singing songs loud. I liked the way these people are enjoying their nights. Some are craving for silent time, some for loud expressions.
I continued my walk, thinking how important it is to be in present. Being barefoot makes me feel the ground. And as I’m on the ground, I feel each and every step of mine. A lot of thoughts were flashing and I had a lot of thoughts to write about. I thought a lot and I also wanted to walk a little bit more to be in the experience of being in present.
I had to drag myself to my room to write as I can’t just keep walking and think about writing rather than writing.
I remember Ruskin Bond telling that it’s easy to lie on the grass and watch the cherry blossom tree than to pick yourself up from that beautiful mood to sit and write about lying on the grass and watching the cherry blossom tree.
It’s beautiful to spend an afternoon in the hills watching birds. But, it’s also important to get up from that tree and from that chair to pick a pen and book to jot down the thoughts. Sometimes, we love experience so much that we post pone our writing but, it’s also important to pick our book and pen to write rather than tell ourselves, let’s experience more.
When do we take a call to write about an experience rather than continuing to experience. An interesting question to stay with.
It's been ages since I walked barefoot all day. The last time I remember walking barefoot for most of the days was in Goa. Living on the beaches and on BITS college campus, I went barefoot and it was fun. As I entered Azim Premji University, I fell in love with the campus. It's maintained really well and though it rains, the foot path is well paved that I hardly get my feet dirty if I have to shift between buildings.
At morning I woke up and I decided to go for a morning walk. Walk I did on barefoot. I enjoyed it. Later, as I had to visit Cafeteria, I chose not to wear anything. At first, everyone who saw me quickly noticed and asked but, as I began to roam around the campus, barefoot no one gave me any looks. I love the times where people don't bother about what others are up to. I walk barefoot, I walk in shorts, I walk in boxers. As long as I'm comfortable, others should be comfortable I guess.
I walked in between buildings, attended some in-person meetings, visited library, met many people- everything on barefoot. I enjoy barefoot as feeling the ground through the feet is another sensorial experience. I walked on hard floor, on pebbles, on pricky stones, on muddy ground, on soft mushy ground. Tried to be immersed in the whole experience of feeling the ground beneath.
Hopefully, I'll try to go barefoot whenever I can.
Thursday, May 19, 2022
Aware of the scorching heat, I've decided to go slow and take my own time to reach the office. These days, I'm selecting one track in loop for the whole ride. This time, it's A.R.Rahman's new song.
I was observing everything I pass on the road and rode to the office. I chanced upon a camel cart where the rider was setting the cart onto the camel. The wood was carved in such a curve that it fits according the figure of camel. On a bright day, I noticed a man sitting on a small red wall with two bottles open. Mountain dew and the other transparent bottle with alcohol in it. He got a glass to mix and sip. What made him to drink alone on a bright sunny day mixing alcohol and mountain dew without anything to munch on. I find it sad when people don't have company to drink.
I took my own time to ride and I 24 minutes to reach the office. In general, I reach in 20 minutes. It's a matter of 4 minutes, I avoided drenching in sweat, avoided the panting and the tiredness. Good start to the day.
Wednesday, May 18, 2022
I was discussing with a person who recently became father of twins. What's their name? I asked.
Aranya & Hiranya, he replied. Curious to know the story of their names, I asked 'What do they mean?'
Aranya means Forest and Hiranya means 'Earth'. He began to explain how earth is called Hiranya Garba.
Why Aranya and Hiranya? I asked.
I love Nature and I wanted to keep this names.
Why not any name related to the Sea or mountains, I enquired further.
I don't like Sea as much as I like the tree and mountains. He began to explain. And as he explained, he shared, "I waited for 16 years to personalize this name in my life. It's been 16 years since he got married. Watching him share about how much he love the names, I was keen to listen to him about what he has to say about these names.
Not only that, I have pet names for my children, 'Ibu' and 'Ija' he shared.
Ibu from Indonesian language and Ija from Pahadi lanugage. Both means, 'Mother' in respective languages.
It's interesting how a few names carry so much of emotion, memories and thoughts.
Meera Ganapati has written this beautiful poem titled, "Every Kiss before 1983."
As soon as I see the title, I perceive that there's time for all romance in 80s. Hope my dad's generation people spent more time being in love and expressing love.
That must be the time for long walks and the silent nights to spend together and talk in between pauses and affirmations, I guess.
What is romance to us? How do we define intimacy? Interesting questions to ponder on.
This poem takes us through the whole journey of frenzy kisses, passionate kisses, shy kisses and kisses that are etched on our hearts, reeling through the mind as one reads Meera's words.
Good one Meera.
Writing a book is synonymous with spending hours and hours with papers, drafts and the blank screens. As I'm struggling with my poetry collection and memoir, I'm at the verge of giving up on memoir. Sadly, I'm too attached to that memoir. I see my life dangled up as I'm scared to touch the draft. One would call themselves lucky, if they continue dealing with all the frustration one get while writing a book. As I'm working on a book, I spend hours with it, trying to tweak a line here and there.
Most of us love writing but don't write because, we love to talk about writing rather than doing the real act, 'writing. Now I got into a difficult position. I'm in need of a people to talk about writing because, that'd atleast keep me on my track of 'writing,' or 'thinking about writing.' I do not want to totally give up on writing the stories, I always wanted to write. Harry is one soul whom I always reach out to, whenever I want to share my thoughts on writing. I don't want to burden him with a lot of my confusion.
I've couple of my friends with whom I try sharing just the ideas as I hardly have friends who read. When I share the ideas, I get responses like, 'you're crazy, too romantic, poetic.'
Yes, I'm all that, I know it. Despite being all that, I can still work on my stories.
After a long time, I rode to office on cycle during hot summers. Listening to Ali Sethi's Chaandni Raat, I cycled through the streets of my colony and then the slight down slopes of airport road. As the bright sun was shining, I was listening to man who was talking about the moon. I took it slow as I know I was being drained out of energy just by being exposed to the sun.
Took around half an hour to ride 5 KM. Glad to pick up the cycle after a long time. I may not dare to get out with cycle, anytime soon when sun is out there. Exhausted.
Tuesday, May 17, 2022
One of the album which is close to my heart. Back in 2009, the effort of visiting internet cafe and browsing for new A.R.Rahman songs was a journey I cherish. There's a lot of effort that goes in the whole process of listening to the new music.
Back in those days, We gotta walk to the nearby cafe. Walking to a shop and buying a toffee was a big task for a 6 year old. Similarly, walking to Internet Cafe for a 15 year old was an exciting time. Back then orkut, gmail, Yahoo Chatrooms, Raaga.com were the usual goto sites.
The experience of walking to the place and waiting for our chance to get the system is still vivid in my memory. In 2009, Satya had a computer in a seperate room with an internet connection. Walking to his house and downloading the songs was a feat. Also, I had to carry a DVD to write the songs on it. After writing Ghajini, Ada, Surya S/o Krishnan songs on one DVD, I get back to home. Play it on DVD. There's no visuals to distract.
Adjusting volume to the type of the song. Not so loud, not so low. Listening to Meherbaan on a sunny afternoon in a lonely house was a memory that's still as fresh as daily morning walk in a low light.
Talking to a friend, we discussed what makes us happy. "Our standards and ambitions to feel happy is a lot high." he pointed out.
"During our childhood, we used to boast about our toys. Now we boast about our cars." I commented. Discussing how materialistic we're and how we're not satisfied with what he have, he share when was the last time, he deeply felt happy.
During the times of Kaho na Pyaar hai, Hrithik Roshan wore a net white T-Shirt. That was a big thing to own. My friend, from UP state called his uncle who stays in Mumbai from PCO, requested him to get a shirt. As uncle got him what he asked for. He felt extremely happy to own that shirt. Something which he badly wanted.
"I bought a lot of things but, never felt as happy as I felt then." he shared.
I think, we're trying to find happiness in big things rather than the little things. If I've to write 100 little things that make me happy, will I write? I guess so. Lemme pick my journal.
After a long trip from Uttarkhand, I didn't get a chance to lay my hands on my Road Runner Pro. I had to send it for a general service and oil check.
I procrastinated a lot to get the bike and as i'm getting ready to travel to Bangalore, I thought I'll get it home. Watching the bike in it's best condition, I was so happy to get back on it. Thanks Shree Ram Cycle Enterprises for the best service. Thanks Rajesh for capturing the moment.
After filling air as I walked out of the store, I wanted to treat myself for having the best cycle to ride.
I checked out a near food joint, exotic Aravalli. Had a decent Dosa and noodles. I was happily eating a lot as I knew I was going to burn everything by riding for a long time.
Spent an hour cycling from one corner to other corner of the city, listening to A.R.Rahman songs.
I thoroughly enjoy these leisurely rides rather than trying to speed up all the time. A good day.
Monday, May 16, 2022
One song. One hour of walk from work place to home. I enjoyed listening to Ali Sethi's song, observing thoughts as they flash. Sometimes with the music, sometimes with the thoughts, sometimes watching people who take a stop to drink the sugar cane juice, the people who are making sugar cane juice at the corner of the roads as well as people who are rushing across the city, hurrying to reach their destination in cars, bikes, e-rickshaws, cycles.
Watching moon at times who seemed sober and peaceful at it's place, I continued walking. Back to the song, I didn't want to understand what Ali Sethi was saying. Neither was it simple to understand. Lemme try to feel the emotions that are being carried by Ali Sethi's voice, I thought.
I wonder what it is to experience. Why do we want to map our experience to meaningful connections? We listen to music and we want to understand it. We want to watch art and want to understand it. The whole pursuit is behind understanding. There's always a battle between cognition and emotion. Why do we want to understand and what state do we live in when we don't understand what we're in. Can't we just take things as they're without understanding?
Thinking about all these, I ended up walking more than 5 KM from workplace to home at my own pace listening to one song. Thanks Aishwarya for the song suggestion. Good Day
Sunday, May 15, 2022
May 15 2013
Message: HAPPY B.DAY!!!!!!!!! :)
Over a few years, the message never got changed to the same recipient,Sharayu, my favorite artist(Senior). I never met her in my first years of the college but, had a lot of interest to know her well. I never bothered to begin a conversation but, on her birthday, I always wanted to share my wishes with her.As years passed by, she left the college and I was in my final year of the college. I met her by chance and we broke the ice by A.R.Rahman tune. And the rest is the story I cherish upon.
It's been 6 years since we bonded our coffee, conversations and music. Thinking of gifting her on birthday, I tried creating a scrap book with full of photographs. Book, I did but, never gifted her. I still cherish the gift I have for her. May be, a few gifts are meant to treasure but not to share.
|The never sent gift|
On this special day, I read all the writings, poems I wrote on her and celebrated in my own way listening to all her covers and recordings.
Happy birthday Sharayu! Have a blast.
Thursday, May 12, 2022
Talking of names with colleagues, we discussed how adults should ask children, if they like their name or not. We can't give opportunity to change the name at very young age though but, they should be asked if they'd like to change the name at some point of life.
Will I change my name now? May be not. In the past(when I was 7 year old) I felt like changing my name, as people hardly pronounce my name right. Even now, people struggle to pronounce it right. I just accepted that people call it in their own way.
A colleague shared the conversation of how it went with 3rd class students when he talked of names with them.
"If you've to change your names, what will you change your name into?," he asked the children.
"I'll change from Bhawani Ram to Bhawani Singh." one kid expressed his wish. Apparently the kid finds power in Singh, I thought.
Other kid shared, "I'll change my name into 'Payal.'" The whole class laughed. On being asked, why? he said, "Long time ago, one girl came to my class named 'Payal' and she left. That's why I want my name to Payal.
Listening to the Amit's anecdote, Ambika, Amit & I discussed how we include names we love and names of the persons we love wherever we find an opportunity.
Amrutha, Samhita are my character names. Will share the story behind this on some day.
Amit shared how he included name 'Aranya' in the academic handbook where he had to write an example. We never lose an opportunity to express the love, right?
Wednesday, May 11, 2022
Rahul called up saying he has reached Bowrampet. During our engineering days, Rahul spent more time in Bowrampet than at his home or the classrooms. I believed him immediately and began to scold him for not sharing about his arrival from US. A quick shift to Video call, he is standing in front of his new red car, Dodge challenger. Glad to see him sharing about his new possession.
Slowly, we discussed what we're upto in our lives. Talking of friends, we included Sunny, Sachin, Jaya, Naveen(ding). After a long time, we caught up in a call and spent hour discussing what we're dealing with. We discussed how screwed up we're in being aware of our emotions. With these people, it's easy to share our struggles, our worries and all our doubts. Glad to have these people around.
Jagjit's Chaand ke Saath continues to stay on loop. Discussing the lyrics of the song, we realised that the writer has tried capturing the human psyche in this ghazal.
How do we map all our struggles to one thought/person and make our life a big struggle? Ambika pondered. Identifying that we're doing such act itself is a big achievement, I thought.
Looking at how deep the writer has thought, I feel that Arts is Science. One cannot keep arts and science exclusive. Without understanding human psyche, biology, and much more, one can't identify or feel the human emotions. Even if one process the emotions, they need words to articulate in such manner. We feel that Arts is very elusive,out of the world and science is what makes lives better. I feel, we need both and personally, I feel we need more art for a better world to live in.
Thanks Jagjit again for the words.
Tuesday, May 10, 2022
How do we listen to others?
I realized that we need to be involved in the conversations to actively listen. It's not just about listening, it's more about being self aware of what state are we in. We are always in a rush to respond. I recollect words which got publicized as Garcia's.
Anyway, I could resonate with these lines.
"I would not say everything that I think but I would definitely think everything that I say."
The song was already selected. The artist as well. The young Jagjit Singh's live recording on Chaand ke Raat.
We hardly spoke in the car, as we were keen on listening to how Jagjit Singh was singing. A little bit of Wah, Woah in between and there's only Jagjit's voice being played in the car.
As we were nearing the office, Ambika played the version where Old Jagjit sang the same song in his own style.
Talking about her favourite lines, she recited,
Dil ne ek eent se tameer kiya Taj Mahal , Tumne ek baat kahi,lakh fasane nikle!!
How often our imaginations go grand with a small hint/hope shared by our love. I could totally relate to it. Thanks Jagjit for penning these words.
Monday, May 9, 2022
I was writing to my friend and I felt a strong urge to tell her, "Writing is not easy! Writing is super difficult as it demands to be brutally honest to ourselves."
It's very easy to write, I told myself all the time and kept writing but, there are times where I don't write at all. I knew that I had to drag myself and jot the words. There's a lot of self doubt, fear of audience, fear of excellence. I realised, the narrative, I tell myself that, "It's very easy to write." is not helping in anyway.
I'm trying to accept that, writing is difficult as it's takes to be honest. If being honest is easy to us, writing will become easy. Being honest with what's happening in our mind and body, will help us to write. Being an observer rather than the controller of what's happening within ourselves will give us a back seat to observe and write rather than believing we control everything. we try to excel to write and if we don't get those words right, we stop writing.
First, accepting that writing demands a lot of honesty worked for me. May be different narrative can work for different people.
If I have to meet any of my love again after 30 years with whom I departed, loved, hated, trusted, believed, spent time, made memories? Will I? Yes, I would!
Similarly, Marina Abramovic and late Ulay decided to catch up for a conversation , recollecting their journey after 30 years of break. They've a legacy that the world would never forget for, the way they've created life experiences.
Conversations between Marina and Ulay shows how they've started their creative journey and went on to perform pushing themselves to explore the ideas of performance.
When they wanted to end their 12 year relation, they chose to walk over the great wall of China, to end it, to say Good bye. I got to know how 'performance' is perceived. These days, 'Movement' has become a trendy thing on social media. It's interesting to see how they've created time-based art which could only be witnessed in-person. The recording, the footage are again the duplicity of the art.
Watching them recollect their earlier days, it's nice to see how their love was flourished, seasoned and evolved in many ways.
At the end, they talk about death. 'Let's have great death, as we had great life,' mentions Marina.
A must watch. Loved the documentary.
A brilliant masterpiece. Kunhikuttan, a kathakali dancer during 1950s has an illicit relationship with a lady from aristocratic family. The story goes on with how the lady perceives the protagonist and how the protagonist struggles to persuade the love.
Mohan lal and Suhasini are brilliant in their acting. The storytelling is musically, visually a master piece. I can't believe that in 1999, Indian Cinema has got such master pieces.
Sunday, May 8, 2022
Walks are the best time to be ourselves and observe our thoughts and emotions. As I got out of the theater workshop, I decided to spend sometime on the grass. I walked along the Jawahar Circle, watching the trees. I've walked a lot of times but, every walk helps me to be in the moment. It doesn't remind me of the past memories or doesn't give me ideas on what I'm going to do.
I walked along processing the complex emotions I got. Over the strolls, I was not into other people. Everyone are trying to get lost in their minds while walking, I got lost in my mind.
I walked and ended up at a place where I first walked and sat on the grass, when I came to Jaipur for the first time in 2020. The same spot where I visited during the evening and saw the moon in blue evening sky. The canopies obstruct the LED lights. There's a bit darkness and also a low light.
Sleeping on the grass changed the way I feel. My body responded to the grounding. The head feels tingly and the hands have the goosebumps. The idea of being relaxed is to sleep on the grass without thinking of what people would think on the road. The road is for the vehicles and the grass is for the humans to rest. I rested staring at the sky.
It was much needed. Thanks Jaipur for maintaining good places like this to rejuvenate at times.
Friday, May 6, 2022
I like eating healthy food. It's just that I don't cook healthy food. For that matter, I don't cook junk food either.
I always hosted parties and friends cooked chicken and a lot of exotic dishes. Dyu always cooked spanish omelette, chicken & rice, noodles, pasta and more continental dishes. Azhar cooks mutton, dal and Baat. Other friend recently cooked Dal and rice. Simple Dal and rice. Dal and rice is what I always tried to cook but, I always dumped everything in the cooker, boil it and try to eat it. For the first time, witnessing someone cooking in a simple way, I could appreciate it as well as seemed possible for me.
Today, I got a handful of veggies, which I never do. I always buys in Kgs. Yeah, I got poor estimation skills. Today, I bought handful of tomatoes, Ivy gourd and some chilli.
I soaked dal first and I finely chop the onions, tomatoes. The whole process seemed to be in flow. Years of struggle and also little inspiration, I could find myself doing better in the kitchen.
I fried the onions, then tomatoes. Finally, I added dal and all the needed powders and waited for the whistles. Along with it, cooking rice was easy peasy, thanks to electric rice cooker.
Every time, I feel I'm clumsy and struggle to do the basics. For the first time, I felt I got the hang of being in the kitchen.
Good day, ending with dal, rice and some lemon pickle. Thanks friend for helping me to find happiness in simple meals.
Thursday, May 5, 2022
Thanks to Vaishnavi, I discovered Parvaaz Band. On April 3.2022, a whole playlist of Parvaaz was played. It started with Shaad and I listened to all the picks. Looking through their Instagram handle, I found that they're playing live in Bangalore on June 10th. I'd love to attend but, I'm not sure of my schedule. Hopefully, next time.
Whenever Ambika and I are in Jaipur, we go to office together at times. Most of the times, I’m on my cycle taking 40 minutes to reach the office, and Ambika spending 20 minutes to reach the office. I’m a tenant at Ambika’s place. Whenever we decide to go together in car. We go at ease, discussing what’s happening at home and life. Jaipur is not as busy as Hyderbad or any other big city. Hardly there's traffic during the peak hours as well.
During our short drive, Ambika has the playlist curated for our drive. Often, the conversations go intense and music always works as pacifier and ice breaker to lighten the mood.
I got introduced a lot of new artists. Mostly, we pick classical music. Rahul Deshpande and some other classic albums are my favourites.
Today, we were listening to Rahul Deshpande’s album 'Me Vasantrao'.
At evening, Bade Acche Lagte hai was on loop. Today, we had an interesting conversation on trees as well.
Why the tree shape is the way it is?
Depending on the delayed expression of the genes of the trees, the shape varies. Also, I got to know a few terms which are used in botany. Genotype and phenotype.
Thinking of canopies, we spoke of the leave shedding.
Leafless trees always seem poetic to me. It seems to be energy efficient mechanism of the trees. Trees need more energy to replenish the chlorophyll in present leaves than shedding the drying leaves and get a new.
“The whole evolutionary process, trees took up can be seen through seasons,”Ambika explained. Discussing the importance of night, we agreed who science should get into popular writing and bring awareness on many areas.
Listening to Bade Acche Lagte Hai, we reached home at ease, without a worry. No traffic, no fuss. Four times of Bade Acche Lagte Hai. Thanks Ambika. Grateful for the drive and the company.
Wednesday, May 4, 2022
I took out all the journals to read out to a friend. Looking at the number of journals, I took out, I was surprised to see how much I wrote over the years.
The act of reading out our inner most thoughts.
I never thought that I'd read out my journal to any person. Journals and writer notebooks are some material that doesn't need any reader other than it's writer for, they can be dark, gloomy, happy, bright, confusing, condemning, foolish, futile, silly, and what not.
To be vulnerable and read out what we think is one hell of an adventure.
As I got out all the journals lying on the table, I began writing.
I wrote a lot of poetry and realized, I've so much poetry in these journals which are unpublished and untouched.
On April 15.2022, I got the idea of working on this project. May.3.2022, I'm happy with the basic draft I got. Following Stephen King's advice, will try to finish off this project within 3 months.
Darkness needs better descriptions and metaphors to fight the light pollution and also the notion we carry collectively.
I resonated with Emily Dickinson's words.
Either the Darkness alters — Or something in the sight Adjusts itself to Midnight — And Life steps almost straight
Tuesday, May 3, 2022
Monday, May 2, 2022
Two decades ago, when I used to visit the saloon along with my Dad, I used to meet vibrant barber who easily catch up with strangers over the current affairs and also the local updates which everyone forgets once they walk out of saloon. It's been long time since I met such vibrant barbers as they got TVs to do the talking rather than them. Soon after that we got the music system that keeps playing some music. The music varies from devotional to EDM. Today, I visited a shop where the stylish barber has got some Baba's bhajan on youtube played.
The youtube video: the baba is narrating a story in the form of lyrical way, a couple who adopts an orphan and gives him all the riches. Instead of being grateful, the adopted kid falls in love, gets addicted to alcohol and forsakes the parents.
The barber took a break, opens the Ghutka packets and tells me, "sun rahe ho, the orphan got adopted and he's taking into the addiction path," while mixing the Ghutka. What are you doing stranger? I wanted to poke him. Quite an irony that an Ghutka eating person is judging an orphan who is taking an alcoholic addiction path.
Later, he tells his story. " Maybe you begin your day with Chai, I used to begin it with a beer. I was that kid. From morning 7 till night 12. I was high on alcohol and money. I had a lot of money. My parents were worried that I earn money but, I spend them also without a thought.
I went near my home but didn't go home. I spent 8-10 days but, didn't visit home. I was with friends and partied."
The smile he got in narrating his story, I wonder if that was pride or the regret. Hope he figures out what he's feeling on his life.
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