Wednesday, December 8, 2021
Friday, December 3, 2021
Thursday, December 2, 2021
For some meet up, the organizers asked me, "write a few lines introducing about yourself." How will I introduce myself, I thought. Immediately I wrote these lines. I'm sure I didn't use this write up but, I love this one as I love to introduce myself in these words.
Being on the move all over my life marred many of my views. To learn is to live and to live is to learn. More than everything I identified with sound and word. Eventually, I became ‘word’ person. I’m more of a poet and a dreamer. Idealistic are my thoughts, realistic is how I try to make my life.
2021. My first movie in Jaipur theatres.
I always wanted to know about Diana but procrastinated watching the Netflix series. Thanks to friends' insistence, I watched it. I wish to see Kristen in some happy light movies rather than intense dramas.
Monday, November 8, 2021
Till the time I was in Hyderabad, I celebrated my birthday in different ways. In 2018, I hitchhiked to Bidar the whole day and spent the evening at Gurudwara.
In 2019, I moved to Rajasthan and stayed inactive on social media through out wondering if anyone cared to know my whereabouts. A lot of people indeed cared. A lot of loved ones made an effort to call on my birthday even though we didn't stay in touch for an year. And also, in the same year, I got a chance to celebrate my birthday with the children who showered their love with warmth greetings.
In 2020, after a long time, I stayed at home for my birthday. For once, I celebrated it in sober manner.
In 2021, I'm thinking of reminding all my friends about my birthday, not to be self-centered but it's good to break the silence we've been maintaining for a long time.
As I hid my birthday on social media, half of my friends didn't bother to remember and wish. I'm grateful for everyone who remember and who do not remember as well.
Recently one of my friend called up, just to make sure she remembers my birthday right as she remembers the birth month but not sure of date.
Seeing other friend sharing gratitude on her birthday, I realized my birthday has been skipped from a lot of my friends' memory. (One more way to tell myself that people love me but, their memory keeps failing.)
Talking to other friend, he shared how he decided to call up his friends on his birthday, just to remind them about the 'important day'. It's good to have good time na. No matter who reminds them about the special day.
So lads, November is my birth month. Don't bother if you do not remember the date. Will share it soon.
Who doesn't love gifts! A decade ago, I shared a wish list with my bestie. Best friends are best friends for a reason. She gifted me all the books I asked for.
This time, I'm putting efforts to share it with everyone because, I believe in asking.
Here's the wish list for my birthday:
And here's the postal address:
c/o Azim Premji Foundation
Airport Terminal, 2nd Street
Note: I love hand written letters and post cards :)
Sunday, November 7, 2021
For months, I feared to touch my draft hearing to a voice that I may not be good at working now. Indeeed I was terrible at beginning. I just stared at the screen. Putting up with the silence, I began to correct the words that had spelling mistakes removing the red underlines in the word. Continuing to pace, I told myself to spend time. Just spend time with it. As I spend time, I got frustrated. Knowing that my frustration emotion is about struggling to move forward in the story, I remained silent. I knew where my emotions were coming from. I didn't try to narrate myself another story on my frustrating emotions. I was there, staring at the screen and flowing words. I continued editing a bit by bit, word by word. Working on three chapters, I feel good about coming so far. I realised it's about being patient. Patient with the progress.
Saturday, November 6, 2021
This kind of stories need to come out. Through Harry's blog I got interested to watch this movie. Jai BHIM is a story of tribal woman fighting the system to get the justice. This movie is based out a real story and it has the elements that take us to reflect our past and the brutalities we're committing to fellow humans in the name of caste. I wonder if Telugu cinema can come up with stories that revolve around oppression and caste discrimination.
Sneha, Dyu are in town. Three of us went out in search of good food. Three of us are big time Biryani fans. As our standards in appreciating the non-veg is very high, we were critical in choosing the food joints. Handi was the final selected one, as it boasted about it's Handi on Google.
Retrospecting our life at Sirohi, we relished on Bajra Roti and Laal Maans. Ended the meal with not-so-bad lassi.
Leaving them at the station, I walked down the roads of Jaipur. Jaipur is a scenic city. I'm happy that I live here which doesn't have much buzz but has it's own aura.
Spent some time watching Elizabeth's statue and hopping onto the E-Rickshaws I reached home munching too much of Banaras Paan available at Gandhinagar Jaipur.
Tuesday, November 2, 2021
On a cold november night, I was walking from Jawahar Kala Kendr to home. 10KM away, I decided not to rely on cab. I wished to take an auto, public transport but, looks like the world has listened to my wish and made all the autos and public transport go in every lane but, not in my road. Why don't I take the help, I thought and began to raise the thumb and ask for the help. Hitchhike to home!
Hitchhiking in Rajasthan? is it as easy as I get in my place, I thought. I realized I’m being judgmental about the places and the whole point is to just wait, rather than expecting something out of it.
All these thoughts didn’t change any probability of what I get. But I walked and walked and there was this one Scorpio. Path decide. And there was this long fair sharp featured handsome man in a dark green shirt, blue jeans. Trying to get into the car.
So I met Omar Khan. I didn’t expect to hitchhike. I was waiting, and I waited, and waited, and waited and I thought we liked it.
Can you give me lift? I asked. "Left?" he repeated.
I repeated LIFT. "Aajao," he waved his hand. I got onto his car, a dark green spacious Scorpio.
As I just got into the car, a bike rider stopped by asking for directions. "You tell," he looked at me. "I don't know the place." I asserted.
"Are you not from this place?" he enquired. "No, I'm from Hyderabad. I'm new to this place." I answered him.
Looking at him. I thought he’s a and yes, he is. He from Delhi to goa. Delhi to A Pradesh. Basically every part of India in his car with all his camera gear. Discussing works, I shared mine, he shared his. "I'm a cinematographer man behind the camera." I do commissioned work, most of the time.
Discussing the way he approaches his work and the role of social media. He shared his insight on how putting our creative work can be helpful. "There can be people who can relate. It's always to put it out there rather than not sharing it."
And on that note, we thought we’ll stay connected through Instagram. Thanks Omar for the ride and the conversation.
Not clear of what's happening with me, I dialed a friend to share my random thoughts.
My friend mentioned, "You need to know where the emotions are coming from? The emotions created fog in my mind where I couldn't see anything clearly. I had no clarity, couldn't prioritize things. The moment I could realise where the emotions are coming from, I was one step ahead, clearing out the fog."
I could relate easily. Time to clear out the fog that's blurring my clarity.
Monday, November 1, 2021
Wednesday, October 20, 2021
During lockdown, I've started writing morning pages and I went on with the streak of 100 days and more. I tried writing morning pages again. I used to write but, inconsistent at it. It's been four days since I started morning pages again. I could realize that there's a lot that I want to write as I put down my thoughts on 3 long pages every morning.
There's a lot that's taken off from my the mind letting the creativity to churn.
Comes the white man asking for more
Greedyy to take things home
He made a ship out of me
When I look at my journal at times, I'm surprised by what I write. Reading out the below lines, I was surprised on why I wrote this. This is about nature but, very incoherent. Putting it here to reflect more in the future.
Grazed out the house
And cleared out the land
As white man put the line on the roads
He needed me to support down
Didn't end with the down
But also covered everything with me
The cut the trees and drop away in Ganga
If monkey eats one fruti
What should it eat the rest of the time.
The scavengers on road
The carcass is all there lying around
When I went to crossword, I found a lovely row filled with cushioned seats. I searched for small books to finish them in one sitting. While I was browsing, I could find this ART Matters by Neil Gaiman illustrated by Chris Riddell.
It is divided into two parts. One is on why we need to introduce books to children. Other is how to practice whatever art we're practicing. In the first part, Neil discusses about how we think, argue, debate, discuss through word. Be it any art, we can either agree, disagree, debate, argue, appreciate through our thoughts. The finer we articulate our thoughts, the better we can communicate with others. With this dialogue, communication, we can avoid other means(violence) when we want to disagree.
In the second part, Neil talks about why we need to create, how we need to look at our work. He also had a tip for the free lancers. Neil talks about being artists, he says, "We do not know what's gonna happen and there's no certain pattern. That gives us endless possibilities. That's scary but, also fun. In other works, there's a certain pattern or limited possibility."
I like the way he described on what it is to be an artist.
Tuesday, October 19, 2021
Saturday, October 16, 2021
Friday, October 15, 2021
On a festive day, I woke up late at 10.30 am, noticing the still fan. There's power cut in the house. For a long time, there seems to be a power cut in the house. Thanks to coal crisis. I got out of bed, freshen up and after a long time, I felt I'm on a holiday. Earlier I took two months attending family, leaving the professional work. In the span of those two months, I have seen a death in the family, fell sick, been with family and grieved through out, travelled to attend the work.
After resettling in Jaipur after 50 days, this holiday seemed to be a proper holiday to spend time with myself, all by myself. I looked at my long note book and went on with my morning pages. It's a good start on a holiday. Soon after some writing, I went on with painting. I forgot about the food and I painted for hours.
Calm cozy holidays reminds me of friends who always insisted me to enjoy the calmness the holidays bring rather than buzzing around everywhere during holidays. Today, I'm all alone with my own company, enjoying to do things I enjoy to do, for the sake of doing it. Good day.
Thursday, October 14, 2021
I met Zehra Naqvi in a story reading session where she was narrating a Ruskin Bond's story. We interacted through the session. Knowing more about her, I got to know about her new book and the blog. I enjoyed reading her blog. Honest and inspiring. Waiting for the book to own it.
Here's the book link for pre-order.
Thursday, October 7, 2021
Wednesday, October 6, 2021
It had rained for four days. "Iss saal toh bahut baarish horaha he." exclaimed friends at workspace. Is it not usual to have rains in rainy season I thought. No. They have responded. Last year, it rained twice. This year, it's more than that.
Thankful to my neighbours, I was commuting in their car. Looking at the logged roads, I couldn't dare to get my cycle to ride through those roads. The water was flowing.
It's been years but, I never got into a situation where I had to face these water logging issues, man hole issues.
I always had a car to tuck in during these rainy days. I'm grateful for it.
There was a young couple who got drenched in rain and closed her eyes trying to hide behind her partner. I found another guy in his formals with his helmet on, going against the rain. Bravo.
No sooner we crossed Manasarovar, there was no rain. I wished to stand, right at the place where it's raining and where it's not.
Drew Dudley: Everyday Leadership
In a six-minute talk, he triggers a lot of memories that had impacted me in my life. Memories caused by people who may never knew that they had impacted my life just like, how Drew Dudley shares his story in this talk. Weaving the anecdote with the glittering finishes on leadership, this talk helps us to reflect on how we look at leadership and how we may impact a lot of lives by redefining the way we look at leadership.
Few stories from the memory Lane.
During my Engineering Days, many of my friends bought a laptop and they hardly used laptops for studying purposes. CAD, Katia and a lot of softwares can be learnt suggested seniors. But, I knew I was not keen to put extra efforts in learning those softwares. So I postponed the idea of buying the laptop. Buying a laptop worth 50,000 was a lot back in 2012. However, over the years, in 2014, I wished to have a laptop, as I began to work on various tasks and wished to own a laptop to increase the productivity.
“I need a laptop Dad.” I asked him.
Already I had a desktop which I got to watch movies, listen to songs and play NBA. I did everything except for any study purposes. I wished to have a mobile laptop.
“When do you want it?” He asked. Knowing the situation in house, I said, I’ll take my time. Dad interrupted me and said, “Dabbulu eppudaina vasthayi, if you want it, I’ll get it somehow.” He mentioned.
I was shocked by his words. Knowing the tough situation at home, it was tough for me to ask but, my Dad was ready to go for an extra mile to meet my needs. His words meant all the love and care he had on me. He wanted me to grow. I always had a respect. I could never live a life for him nor worked on his dreams. He was okay with it. I always made him feel compromised on his dreams. I wish I make him feel proud once.
On my visit to Udham Singh Nagar school, I met Mounika of Class 12. She has studied in Azim Premji School and attended Alumni meet in her school.
"It's been two years since you passed out of school, what's a major difference in your thoughts? I asked.
"During schooling, I assumed that friends are going to be there forever and we can meet often but, as time passed, I discovered that we can't meet them often. It gets difficult to meet them and stay connected."
During my childhood, I wanted all my friends to be at a place where I could meet them in an hour. Everyone turned out to be busy in their lives including me. It's difficult to catch up often, I learnt it late compared to Mounika.
“What kind of music do you listen to?” I asked her while walking along on a road. I’m on my feet and she got her cycle along with her, walking on the road.
“I listen to happy music.” She mentioned, “There’s no point of listening to sad music when you’re already sad.” I try avoiding sad music when I’m sad. She mentioned.
True, rather than delving too much into sadness, one can get along with sadness by coping with it and trying to come out of it rather than ignoring it.
"What's abstract?" I asked Malavika.
"Abstract is abstract." she confirmed without a second of doubt.
Before I could express my confusion, she walked to a near by painting and pointed out to a triangle. "It's a triangle by itself but, in context, it represents something. When it represents something, it stops to be abstract."
Anything that represents something can't be abstract in whole. I learnt. But, I'm not sure if I got it right. It's interesting to play around the abstract and realism stuff.
Myriad could be the life experiences
Amazing could be the creative stimulus
At the end of the day
What it matters, is to sit and create
Day in Day out
We need to arrive at that chair every day, every night to create
Poem. Rhythm. Riff. Characters.
We need to discipline ourselves to create
The struggle to shatter all the judgements we've got and create, is LIFE.
Struggle. Sit. Create.
Repeat until your creation lets you go off from it with a smile.
Interacting with a few students in our school, I asked, "Why do we need libraries? What is it that we get to know other than what we learn from our text books."
Libraries are for general knowledge and text books are there to study. What is general knowledge that we acquire from Libraries, I asked another question.
In text books, we read, write question & answers, do activities and get done with it. In libraries, we can get general knowledge. The famous conditioning that library is a privilege to attain GK. GK is usually something that you would be interested as a supplement. However, kids were still thinking about what is GK and what is common knowledge.
Why do we have libraries in school? How can we leverage the libraries in school?
Tuesday, October 5, 2021
Catching up with the gang after a long time, we spent a evening, taking our own time to warm up. After a long haul of events, Jaya and I hung out at his home. He choked me with his hospitality. A lot of food to eat.
Jaya, Sam and I caught up at Retro discussing what's happening in our lives. Bala & Sunny joined. All of us played cricket for a while. Till we play the game, we were bit distracted. We were there but, we weren't really listening to each other. One hour of game gave us new memories to cherish and also relive the old memories where we spent time without a worry of time schedules.
I promised Anjali that I'd join her when she celebrate her 13th birthday. Due to COVID, I couldn't make it. This year, I'm glad I could make it. Just as I finished my work trip, I headed to wish Anjali.
I walked into the spreading front yard and walked into the house. Little Anjali showed up with a beaming smile. Happy to see her after such a long time. Her favorite Jyo maushi was present. While the adults were engaged in the conversations. Anjali introduced Akela to me. I've been following the way Anjali met Akela, Zor & Zindagi. Finally, I got a chance to meet the mom, Akela.
Anjali and I went on to prepare a drink for us. While I was enjoying the tang, Anjali caught up on phone talking to all her well wishers. Later, both of us sat to do a little sketching. Anjali with her waves and myself with the lines.
Mansi, Anjali's best friend walked in to spend the day with the birthday girl. While Anjali and Mansi had their own time. Harry and I caught up in conversations.
Anjali and Mansi were too involved to come out for a break. They were making soaps from the material they've ordered through Amazon. I joined them and made two soaps. Mix of Blue and green color, I made two soaps, with lavender fragrance.
Chimu and Anjali's Chechi joined us for the cake cutting. Sloka sent a cake. All of us gathered for the cake cutting and had a lot of laughs listening ABBA.
Vajra, Mansi, Anjali and I caught up with series of Scotland Yard games. Anjali won the first game. Mansi also did a great job. Vajra was gracious to let me be the Mr. X and win the last game. However, I messed up the game unintentionally. By the time, we were done with our celebrations, the time was already past midnight.
Thanks Anjali for having me. Had a great time celebrating your birthday.
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